


America's Storage Room Cleaning: Presidential Edition

by LuluCalliope



Series: America's Most Recent Election [2]
Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: American History, American Politics, American Presidents, Historical Hetalia, Other Nations Mentioned, Unofficial Sequel, Why Did I Write This?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-13
Updated: 2017-01-19
Packaged: 2018-09-17 03:41:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,549
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9302621
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LuluCalliope/pseuds/LuluCalliope
Summary: An unofficial sequel to "America is Scared". America cleans his storage room and reflects on the time he spent with his bosses.





	1. Part One: Everyone Before World War One

**Author's Note:**

> Every President is memorable for something...

The leaves on the trees swayed in a graceful, dancing motion on the breeze of the summer morning. It was a perfect day to be outside, but two nations had other plans. “Mr. America, are you trying to clean up here?” Lithuania asked in a meek voice as he followed America down a long hallway. “I-I’ll do it for you,” the older nation offered. America felt so sorry for Lithuania. No one had come out of the Great War unchanged, but Lithuania had changed so much more than some of the others. And before the War, he and Poland had their divorce, then Russia began to bully him...it was just too much for America. He felt so bad for Lithuania that he became the first one to acknowledge Lithuania as an independent nation, and Lithuania had been so grateful that he had come to live and work for America.

But this was something that America had to clean without a housekeeper. He and Lithuania continued to walk through his house. “Oh, no, that’s alright, it’s just a little shit cleaning, I can handle it. I need to see for myself what I should get rid of.”

“As you wish, sir,” Lithuania replied, his head bowed.  _ Poor guy _ , America thought.  _ He needs to stand up for himself after the bullying from Russia. I can help him later. _ “Okay, some coffee. I’ll go make some,” Lithuania excused himself and headed towards the kitchen.

“Thanks, that’d be cool,” America said to Lithuania’s retreating back. He had reached the last door in the hallway. He pushed it open and shed light into a dark, dirty room. The contents of the room were boxes, some of which were open to reveal objects of various origins. The one thing that everything in the room had in common was the thick layer of dust that served as a blanket. America entered and set a large stack of books upon a nearby table. The books were going to remain in the storage room for the time being, until they were ready to be used again. “Ah, great, I can finally clean this place out after nearly a century of collecting dust!” America announced to the silent room. “Looking into your own past is never easy, even for me,” America continued. “I’ve tried to clean this place before, but it brought up so many painful memories I’d get lost in every time I started to clean.” And as America began the process, several bittersweet memories began to resurface in his mind, most of which had to do with Britain...he needed a distraction. So he grabbed a book from a bookshelf that had cobwebs and spiderwebs clinging to the sides. There was no title on the cover of the book that America had selected, but there was something written on the first page. “Times with the Bosses,” he noted. “Oh, yeah...I can’t get rid of this. I can’t forget anyone who worked with me.” A melancholy smile graced his features as he turned the page.

* * *

Flip.

_ April 30th, 1789. My heart is pounding against my ribcage. I’m about to meet my first boss. I’ve met him before, but not as the Commander in Chief. I met him as a general, as a father figure, even as a farmer. But as my boss? Never. I’m not surprised that he was chosen to be my first boss; he WAS elected unanimously by the electoral college, after all. But...I’m anxious. Can we really do this? Am I really ready to be on my own? I feel his gaze upon me as his boat sails closer and closer to land from the Hudson River. I watch him as we walk to Federal Hall. He does something that catches me off guard as we stand on the balcony of the Senate chamber. He’s placed one hand on the Bible held by Chancellor Robert Livingston...but he’s slipped his other hand into mine. I gape at him, but he only replies with a firm squeeze of my hand. We’re ready to be independent. _

Washington was far from perfect, but he was the best person to be the first American president. 

Flip.

_ November 1st, 1800. The carriage ride has been far from quiet as John Adams and I discuss the most recent election. He seems a little bitter about the results and the fact that he won’t be my boss anymore come January, but I know that there are other things bothering him. His son just passed away, for one thing. But all talk stops with the carriage as we arrive at our destination: the brand new President’s House. Even though Adams only has a few months left as my boss, he still gets to live in this mansion. I hear him mutter something under his breath as we approach the front door...it’s a prayer, I think...but our doubts vanish as soon as we step inside. I offer him a warm smile. We’re ready to call this place a home. _

John Adams is overlooked too much in favor of his predecessor. That shouldn’t be the case. He was the first one to meet with Haiti and her boss and is considered to be the “Father of the American Navy”.

Flip.

_ New Year’s Day, 1802. I’ve never seen anything like this. My eyes water, and a single tear slides down my cheek; it’s so beautiful. Six horses are pulling a cart towards the President’s House. What’s in the cart? A pile of cheese, the largest I’ve ever seen. I run towards the cart when the horses stop. There’s a note attached to the neck of the smallest horse; I read it and almost faint from shock. This amount of cheese weighs over one thousand pounds. I turn around to face Thomas Jefferson, who hasn’t left his spot by the front door. “I’ll let you keep it if you promise not to waste your money on wine this year.” He offers a wry smile and I laugh. We’re ready for the new year. _

Thomas Jefferson is known for his many accomplishments, but there are a few things that most people don’t know about him. For example, he spent about twenty-five thousand dollars a year on the purchase of foreign wines. The cheese, which weighed exactly one thousand, two hundred and thirty-five pounds, had been a gift.

Flip.

_ August 24th, 1814. It’s past three in the morning, and England is all but knocking at the front door. He arrived here yesterday with an army to take revenge for what happened to Port Dover, which is something Canada has in his home. James Madison is taking part in the efforts to stall the enemy troops, but he dispatched a messenger earlier informing me to evacuate everyone from the residence. Dolley, however, refuses to leave until the portrait of George Washington is unscrewed from the wall. “Dolley, he’s almost here!” I say through a forced smile, referring to England. “We’ll be in trouble if we’re not gone by the time he arrives!” She won’t step into the carriage. We’re outside and I’m in the carriage with Paul Jennings, my boss’s personal slave. She gives me an impatient look, but then the doorman and gardener appear, rush past her, and place the large portrait in the back of the carriage. Dolley is satisfied. She steps into the carriage, which departs from the place we’ve called home. We’re ready to escape the latest attack in this war. _

James Madison was a great boss in terms of achievements, but he wasn’t to memorable in terms of his personality. His wife, Dolley, on the other hand, became legendary. She wore a turban with foot-high feathers and is often credited for saving the Gilbert Stuart portrait of George Washington from the Burning of Washington during the War of 1812. She left big shoes for future First Ladies to fill.

Flip.

_ March 4th, 1817 _ .  _ James Monroe insisted that we have the ceremony outside. I was reluctant at first, but now that he’s speaking to Chief Justice John Marshall, I realize that it was a good idea after all. It’s a beautiful day outside. Birds are singing, the witnesses seem excited and hopeful. And as I gaze at them and at my new boss, I find that I feel the same way. There’s something about Monroe that fills me with optimism. He isn’t going to live like a President, given that the President’s House was destroyed. But he’s ready to help me, to help the people, move on and recover from our losses and celebrate our victories. We’re ready for an Era of Good Feelings. _

James Monroe was the first President to have his inauguration ceremony outdoors. His most famous accomplishment as President was the Monroe Doctrine. When he was sworn in as President, it began a period of time that would later be called the Era of Good Feelings. During this time, political parties stopped quarrelling (because one of them fell apart). America began to feel a sense of unity and hope following the War of 1812.

Flip.

_ March 4th, 1825. It’s cold and raining outside of the Capitol, but the coldest aspect of the atmosphere comes from the stare of Andrew Jackson. He’s glaring at John Quincy Adams, my new boss. I sigh to myself. This most recent election was...intense. Andrew won the popular vote, not between him, Adams, and Henry Clay, no one received a majority of the electoral votes. After much deliberation, I decided to hand the results over to the House of Representatives. Clay decided to withdraw from the election and sided with Adams, which led to the son of John Adams emerging victorious from the election. I’m not complaining about this, but a lot of people are, especially since there are rumors going around about Henry Clay becoming the next Secretary of State. I glance at John Quincy Adams. His hand is on a book of law, not a Bible. He’s wearing a homespun suit with trousers instead of breeches. I don’t care what Jackson and his supporters say, and Adams doesn’t, either. We’re ready to show that he’s the best fit for President. _

The historical and controversial Election of 1824 was given to the House of Representatives, who ruled that John Quincy Adams would be the next President of the United States. Henry Clay did become his Secretary of State, and tensions between Adams and Jackson grew. The rivalry between Clay and Jackson began as people began to suspect that foul play was involved in making John Quincy Adams the President. John Quincy Adams fought against slavery, worked for internal improvements on canals and federal support for the arts and sciences, and succeeded in lowering the nation’s national debt.

Flip.

_ June 6th, 1833. I’ve never seen anything like this before, so of course I’m terrified to step onto it. I look over at Andrew Jackson and fight back the urge to hurl an insult. He may be my boss, but that doesn’t mean I like him. We just took a stagecoach from the White House to Ellicott’s Mill. Now we’re headed for Baltimore, but we won’t travel by stagecoach. We’re taking the “Iron Horse” instead. Jackson gives me a stern look, but something in his eyes seems...I don’t know, comforting? Sympathetic? Determined? Whatever it is, it makes me WANT to stand next to him, if only for a few minutes. We’re ready to ride a train. _

Andrew Jackson is best known for his Indian removal policies, his work against the Bank that Henry Clay supported, and his support of the system of slavery. If there was anything positive about him, it was that he was the first President to ride a train. He also succeeded in removing the rest of the national debt, continuing the work of John Quincy Adams.

Flip.

_ August 5th, 1837. My head always hurts. The economy has gone to shit, no thanks to Jackson, and Martin Van Buren can’t seem to do anything to fix it. Nothing works. And now my boss says that he doesn’t want Texas to become part of my home. He thinks that it’ll upset the balance of free and slave states and lead to war with Mexico. This excuse makes me so angry. He KNOWS that slavery is wrong, but he thinks that the practice of owning people can continue because of the Constitution. I can’t deal with him anymore. I tolerate him more than I did Jackson, but only slightly. But whenever I meet his gaze, I find that we have one thing in common. We’re ready for him to leave. _

Martin Van Buren only had one positive thing to say about his time as President of the United States. “As to the Presidency, the two happiest days of my life were those of my entrance upon the office and my surrender of it.”

Flip.

_ March 4th, 1841. My legs hurt from standing. I’m shivering from the cold weather. I have to relieve myself. But sixty-eight-year-old William Henry Harrison won’t shut up. He hasn’t stopped talking in over an hour and a half. I glare at the back of his head, and I know that I’m not the only one. How can he stand this weather?! He’s not wearing a hat or a coat! Finally, he stops talking and follows me. We have inaugural balls to get ready for, but I’m in no mood to celebrate. I look over at him, and I realize that he’s not ready to be President. He knows it, too. We’re ready for him to retire. _

William Henry Harrison delivered the longest inaugural address recorded. He spoke for an hour and fifty-five minutes outside the Capitol, despite the cold weather. He died exactly one month after his inauguration, making him the first President to die in office.

Flip.

_ February 28th, 1844. John Tyler shrugs and looks at me, and my smirk answers the unasked question. We’re currently on the USS Princeton. A new naval gun called “the Peacemaker” has already been fired three times and the gun crew is getting ready to fire it once more. John Tyler seems to think that we can stay below deck just for one more drink with the dignitaries. After all the work we’ve done, we need some peace and quiet. I lift the glass to my lips, then the whole ship lurches, sending everyone around me tumbling. I tumble with them. My ears feel like they’re on fire; what WAS that sound? A shrill scream manages to penetrate my pounding, aching ears, and a beautiful brunette stumbles backwards and faints. Moments before she hits the ground, my boss catches her in his arms. I look at him, and even though I can’t hear what he’s telling me, I know what he wants. We’re ready to get as many people as we can to safety, then get to the bottom of whatever just happened. _

John Tyler had been a widower of two years before the USS Princeton incident. When the Peacemaker was fired for the fourth time, something went wrong, which led to the deaths of six people, including State Senator David Gardiner. His daughter Julia, according to the tales, became hysterical at the sound of the explosion and fainted in John Tyler’s arms. They were married later that year. Because of the explosion, people began to reexamine the way that cannons were made. John Tyler was a family man. Between Julia and his first wife, he fathered fourteen children, including one daughter when he was seventy years old.

Flip.

_ May 29th, 1848. I’m bored. James K. Polk isn’t the worst boss I’ve had, but he isn’t the best, either. I think I’d like him a lot more if his wife, Sarah, wasn’t so strict. She’s a Methodist. As soon as she came to live with us, she banned alcohol and card playing from the premises. I miss Dolley Madison so much. I need something to surprise me, a bit of good news...something...as soon as I think that, the door to the room opens, and in comes my boss with a piece of paper. He has a triumphant glint in his eye as he tells me that we’ve acquired Wisconsin. I grin back at him, excited. We’re ready to expand even more. _

James K. Polk and everything he accomplished is mostly overlooked, but some historians consider him to be the most important President in between Jackson and Lincoln. He acquired Wisconsin for America, as well as Iowa.

Flip.

_ April 19th, 1850. The issue of slavery gets more and more intense with each year that passes. Zachary Taylor, my current boss, owns one hundred slaves. He’s done nothing whatsoever to resolve the problem at hand. If things keep going the way they’re going...if no progress is made...I don’t want to think about it. I don’t even want to think about my boss. “Old Rough and Ready” may be a war hero, but he is not a good President. At least something is happening today, something that could be a potential solution. I’m looking forward to it. I give Taylor a curt nod as we prepare to meet with Henry Clay. We’re ready to hear his compromise. _

Henry Clay served as the brains of the Compromise of 1850, which was signed after Zachary Taylor, the last President to own slaves while in office, died. Taylor only served one year as President of the United States before his sudden death.

Flip.

_ November 24th, 1852. I feel like a child on Christmas morning. I can’t believe that this is happening! Millard Fillmore shakes hands with Matthew Calbraith Perry, and the latter steps onto his ship. I want to follow him so badly, but I know that my boss needs me here. Foreign relations are tense at the moment, and the issue of slavery still remains unresolved. But still...I can’t help but feel excited and hopeful as I watch Perry step onto the ship. I shout at his back, “Farewell! Tell me everything about Japan when you get back!” Millard chuckles from behind me, but I don’t care. We’re ready to form an alliance with Japan. _

Millard Fillmore, like the rest of the world, was tired of Japan’s policy of isolation, so he was the one who ordered the Perry Expedition. Fillmore wanted Japan to become America’s friend, even if it was by force. Unfortunately for Fillmore, he left office before Perry could even reach Japan.

Flip.

_ New Year’s Day, 1855. I knock on the door to the bedroom. The occupant of the room, First Lady Jane Pierce, has lived behind closed doors ever since her husband was sworn in as my boss. She wasn’t at the ceremony and she hasn’t made any public appearances. “Jane,” I call out to her, my voice as gentle as it can be. “I know you’re scared. But there’s nothing to worry about, I promise you. Nothing bad is going to happen. No one is going to hurt you.” God, why are my eyes watering? “We want to help you, Jane. Everyone wants to see you so they can help you through this. And staying up here isn’t going to make things better.” It takes some more coaxing, but she finally opens the door. I examine her face for signs of tears, but I find nothing. But she’s still sad; I can see it in her eyes. I offer her my arm, and she places it in mine as we go to meet her husband, my boss. We’re ready for her to leave seclusion behind. _

On January 6th, 1853, the same train that would carry Franklin Pierce to his inauguration killed eleven-year-old Benjamin Pierce. Two other children of Jane and Franklin had died at very young ages. Mrs. Pierce believed that God was punishing her husband for becoming President. She made her first public debut as the First Lady two years after Benny’s death, but she and Franklin never recovered, and the grief led Franklin to depend on alcohol. As a result, his performance as President suffered.

Flip.

_ December 20th, 1860. I’m dying. As parts of my territory break away, I feel like my body shatters. There’s going to be a Civil War, and my boss, James Buchanan, hasn’t done anything to keep me in one piece. He stands over me, paralyzed with fear. I’m in my deathbed. Everything seems so dark and distant, and even though my boss holds my hand, he still seems so far away. His grip tightens on my hand. Before my eyes close, acceptance overcomes me. We’re ready to leave this way of life behind. _

South Carolina seceded on December 20th. Over two months, other States would leave the Union and form the Confederate States of America. Buchanan left things in the hands of his successor. Perhaps his poor performance as President was due to his lack of a wife, but many suspected that America’s first bachelor President was hiding something other than skeletons in his closets.

Flip.

_ April 14th, 1865. Abraham Lincoln surprises me when he greets me with a smile in the morning. He and I haven’t been in our best condition the past few months. The Civil War is over, yes, but we still have trouble sleeping, especially Lincoln. He’s been having strange dreams lately. Mary thinks they’re prophetic. She seems on edge when he tries to extend his cheerful mood to her. I shrug my shoulders and agree to go on a ride with the couple. If my boss isn’t worried about life, why should I be? Maybe we do need something cheerful. As we ride, he leans over and takes his wife’s hand in his. He says that he has tickets for the Ford Theater tonight, and I smile. That’s the distraction we need. We’re ready for a night out. _

That night, Abraham Lincoln became the first President to be assassinated. Lincoln had admired the work of his assassin, actor John Wilkes Booth, but the meeting between the two men did not go the way the President had envisioned. Several weeks before Abraham’s death, John’s younger brother Edwin saved Abraham’s son Robert by pulling him to safety before he was hit by oncoming trains. Edwin had no idea that he had rescued the President’s son, and he had no idea that his brother would kill the father of the man he had just saved.

Flip.

_ May 16th, 1868. When I first met Andrew Johnson, I hated him. I watched him at Abraham Lincoln’s second inauguration. He was drunk and incoherent. Lincoln was struggling not to cry; he was so ashamed. I had to learn to work with and live with Johnson after the awful tragedy...and now I might lose him. I’m not ready to lose another boss. I can’t be alone, not now. But today we’re going to meet with Senate and hear their decision. Is Johnson fit to be my boss? Should he be impeached? We’re summoned into the chamber, and before I step through the door, I feel his eyes on the back of my head. I let him enter the room first. We’re ready to hear the verdict. _

Andrew Johnson, the vice president of Abraham Lincoln, was drunk at Lincoln’s second inauguration. He made such a fool of himself that he hid from public eye until Lincoln’s death forced him into the Presidency. After he struggled with Reconstruction and fired his Secretary of War, he became the first President to face impeachment. He was acquitted by only one vote.

Flip.

_ December 12, 1874. I have to admit that I was doubtful when the people decided to appoint another war hero as my boss. But Ulysses S. Grant has grown on me. And I’m very happy to be working with him tonight. We have a very important guest joining us for dinner: King David Kalakaua of Hawaii. I hope he enjoys his visit. I want to make more alliances and become friends with more nations. In the distance, someone announces the king’s arrival, and Grant and I go to greet him. We’re ready to receive a monarch at the White House for the very first time. _

Ulysses S. Grant was, in fact, the first President to have a monarch dine with him at the White House. Grant’s granddaughter later married into Russian royalty, much to the joy of Ulysses’ wife, Julia.

Flip.

_ March 2nd, 1877. I can’t believe this is happening. The inauguration of my new boss is in two days...and the people don’t seem to know who will be taking over the position as my boss. I haven’t had an election this intense since John Quincy Adams. Twenty votes seem to be “unresolved”...what does that even mean? Although Samuel J. Tilden seems to have won the electoral votes, the people are still grumpy...so Rutherford B. Hayes and I are going to meet with a special election committee. Hayes seems content, like he knows what will happen, and this makes me relax. We’re ready to reach a compromise. _

The result of this particular election was the Compromise of 1877, in which Rutherford B. Hayes became President to appease the Republicans while ending Reconstruction in the South to please the Democrats. During his time in office, Hayes worked for civil service reform.

Flip.

_ July 2nd, 1881. James A. Garfield is a man of many talents. I like having him as my boss. He’s the only man I know who can write a Greek sentence with his right hand and a Latin sentence with his left while speaking German. I’ve never seen anything like it! Even though his parlor trick is impressive, it doesn’t exactly help him in office. Like the people, I’m willing to give him a break, since he’s only a few months into the job. And now we feel like going on vacation, but there’s something we have to do first. We’re currently on our way to the train station, where Secretary of War Robert Lincoln is waiting to see us off. Garfield is looking over something he wrote...a poem, I believe...and I chuckle. We’re ready for his college reunion. _

James A. Garfield reached the train station. Once they arrived, Robert Lincoln, the son of Abraham Lincoln, was forced to witness the second Presidential assassination. Garfield, who had qualified for three federal positions and defeated four other generals in the Election of 1880, only served two hundred days in office. He died of lead poisoning.

Flip.

_ May 6th, 1882. I hate him. I hate my boss so, so much. Chester Alan Arthur is handsome and tall and has great taste in food and wine. I think he’d be happier working as the boss of England or France. He has over two hundred pairs of trousers in his closet; I’ve counted. And some say that he wasn’t even qualified for the position of Vice President under Garfield...we would ask to see a birth certificate, but Arthur seems to have lost it...so the people have to accept that he was born in Vermont. Or they can continue to speculate that he was born in Ireland or Canada. He’s staring at his desk, where a single bill rests in the center. He doesn’t want to sign it. But we know that he has to. I sigh. “I’ll get it taken care of with another boss,” I mutter under my breath. I think he hears me, because he reaches for a pen. We’re ready to sign the Chinese Exclusion Act. _

Chester Alan Arthur was the first President to have controversy surrounding his birth certificate. During his time as President, he faced animosity from Garfield’s cabinet, which contributed to his obscurity in history following his time in office. Arthur was laid to rest in the Albany Rural Cemetery after his death. Robert Lincoln, the only member from Garfield’s cabinet to serve under Arthur, was one of his pallbearers.

Flip.

_ December 6th, 1887. Grover Cleveland is one of the most principled men I’ve ever had to work with. He is unwavering in his beliefs. He works for what he thinks is right...and I feel compelled to him. I want to help him because I know that he’s a good person at heart. And today he’s going to make his position on tariffs known. The government shouldn’t take more money from the people than what they need. He’s written the speech himself; he hasn’t used a speech writer before and he doesn’t need to. We’re ready to address Congress. _

At some point in the summer of 1887, a small boy was brought before President Cleveland. Cleveland patted the boy on the head and told him, “My little man. I am making a strange wish for you. It is that you never be a President of the United States.” That little boy was Franklin Delano Roosevelt. Even though Cleveland was exhausted at the time of the meeting, he ran for a second term...

Flip.

_ July 10th, 1890. Would it be weird if I laughed out loud? I’m trying to wrap my head around this. I’ve just heard that Wyoming has been admitted to my territory. I stare at Benjamin Harrison in disbelief. This is the SIXTH state we’ve accepted since he took office! How does he do it? I shake my head as he gives me a look of faux innocence. How he does it doesn’t matter. We’re ready to accept more people and more territories as States. _

More states were admitted into America during Benjamin Harrison’s term than any other President’s term.

Flip.

_ September 9th, 1893. I was overjoyed when I found out that Grover Cleveland was coming back to be my boss. I began to prepare myself for more time with him...but nothing prepared me for this! I watch my boss pace back and forth. He’s anxious and concerned. Who knows what’s happening behind the closed door? The doctor won’t let us inside...but before I can stand up and force my way into the room, the doctor appears in the hallway. He’s smiles at Cleveland and announces that it’s a girl. I offer him my congratulations before we enter the room. We’re ready to meet the first baby born in the White House. _

Grover Cleveland’s daughter Esther was the first baby to be born in the White House. Another one of his daughters, Ruth, became so popular with the press that a candy bar was named after her. (Yes, the Baby Ruth candy bar is named after Ruth Cleveland, not Babe Ruth, who was four years younger than the President’s daughter.)

Flip.

_ September 6th. 1901. I felt apprehensive a few weeks ago. Anarchists seemed to be killing everyone over the drop of a hat, and there was this uneasy feeling in my gut. I chalked it up to lingering stress from the situation with Spain and Cuba. Now I’m glad that I’ve decided to relax. McKinley is a decent boss, and I’m glad that I went with him to the Pan-American Exposition. McKinley whispers something in my ear about wanting to go to the Temple of Music and shake hands, and I nod in agreement. We’re ready to mingle with the public. _

Later that day, William McKinley was shot by anarchist Leon Czolgosz. McKinley died a few days later from his wounds. His last spoken words were: “It is God’s way. His will, not ours, be done.” A little more than a month later, the assassin was sent to the electric chair. Czolgosz, who had lost his job during the Panic of 1893, said these last words: “I killed the president because he was an enemy of the people一the good working people一I am not sorry for my crime.” Robert Lincoln, who had been close to the Pan-American Exposition at the time of the assassination, refused to meet with other Presidents following McKinley’s death, believing himself to be cursed.

Flip.

_ September 5th, 1905. I’m resisting the urge to shed tears of joy. Whenever I look at my boss, I have to fight my urge to embrace him, physically embrace him, as a friend would hug another friend. He is, without a doubt, one of the most open-minded people I have ever met, and most of all, he is CURIOUS and PATIENT. And today, even though Russia and Japan are the ones signing a treaty, he is the one who made it possible for their war to end. Teddy Roosevelt is a magnificent boss, and I admire him with the whole of my heart. As I look at him and the content look in his eyes, I feel overwhelmed with joy and anticipation. We’re ready to become a major force in world diplomacy. _

Theodore Roosevelt and his daughter, Alice, were truly unique. Alice was the belle of the ball in Washington and became the first President’s daughter to be married in the White House. Her father accomplished so much during his time in office: he visited other nations, established national parks, and became a source of inspiration for the “Teddy bear”. He was the first President to appoint a Jew to a cabinet position and the first President to appoint African Americans to federal positions. But the most important thing, his most admirable trait, was his modesty. If you look at his inauguration address, you won’t find the word “I”.

Flip.

_ April 14th, 1910. This is, without a doubt, the largest audience turnout I’ve ever seen for a baseball game. The fact that my boss is here may have had something to do with it. The Washington Senators are up against the Philadelphia A’s. And now...they want my boss to step up to the plate! I look up at the big, doughy face of William Howard Taft. His small, good-natured eyes seem confused. He’s probably never held a baseball before, much less thrown one. But as the audience screams, a look of determination overcomes him as he and I step up to the plate. We’re ready to throw the opening ball. _

William Howard Taft is remembered for his obesity. People forget that he was the only President to be appointed as Chief Justice of the Supreme Court. Following his time in office, Taft swore in two future Presidents at their inaugurations: Calvin Coolidge and Herbert Hoover.

* * *

America closed the book.  _ I need a break _ . He left the storage room behind and slipped out his back door and into his private garden. That is where Lithuania found him later. “Ah, there you are, Mr. America,” he said as he stepped closer to his fellow nation. He held a tray of the promised coffee in his hands.

With a small smile on his face, America turned to Lithuania. “Hey. I just had to get away from all that dust for a minute. I didn’t really make much progress, but I still think I’m done for the day.”

“Right, it must be exhausting,” Lithuania agreed as he stepped closer. “Would you like to have your coffee here, then?”

“Sure, that sounds perfect,” America said with an enthusiasm he did not feel. He and Lithuania sat on a bench and drank together, and as the caffeine jogged his mind, America felt himself open up. “It’s weird, I’m having quite a difficult time throwing away some of those things.” He chuckled. “You know, I think I might be turning into a sentimental old man.”

Lithuania also chuckled. “No. You’re just turning into an adult.”

“Yeah…” America’s voice trailed off. He stared into his cup of coffee, a frightening question on his mind:

_ What will my adulthood be like? _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eight days until Trump's inauguration.
> 
> Well, this was challenging to write. Here's something lighthearted: a song from everyone's favorite nation, Italy!
> 
> I came to make friends with you! Let's form an alliance!  
> We circle round and round hand-in-hand to the Turning Earth Rondo  
> Stomp on the floor and carolare  
> Wind the pasta around your fork and toast with a big boot!  
> Hetalia on the turning Earth! Ciao! Hetalia  
> Ahh, I want to eat tomato-mato-mato buon appetito  
> Ahh, I won't give in, but I will cry if you hit me  
> (Ahh! I see girls!)  
> We circle round and round hand-in-hand, form a ring to dance the rondo  
> Eat pasta, drink wine, and cantare  
> The Earth turns, it's our Hetalia!


	2. Part Two: From World War One to Today

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: If you're interested in my own political views and opinions on the most recent Presidents, I put in a little note at the end. Every President has brought good and bad to America; we can't forget that.

America’s hand grasped the doorknob, but he made no motion to turn it.  _ Every time I do this, I get carried away in my memories. _ He hadn’t tried to clean out his storage room since the end of World War One. Lithuania had been working for him at the time, and his presence was comforting and made the cleaning process somewhat better. (Of course, America hadn’t done any cleaning or gotten rid of anything, but he digressed.)  _ Maybe this is what I need to do: get lost in my memories and escape from reality without any booze _ . America was still recovering from his most recent election, as were his friends.  _ Maybe this was the best time to do some cleaning and digging through the past. _ Just maybe…

His hand twisted the knob and pulled the door open. The light from the hallway poured through the doorway and shone upon piles and piles of boxes, furniture draped in cloth, and books. Nothing had changed from the last time. America bit his lip and got to work.  _ I can get rid of this; I only used it once...I can throw this away...oh, this was a gift, what’s it doing in here? I can give this to someone else...what’s this? _ He was crouched down by a collection of books when his hands grazed over one. He picked it up, blew the dust off, and examined the cover. There was no title. He opened it to the first page. “Times with the Bosses,” he read aloud. “Oh, yeah, I remember this.” He began to flip through the pages, a small smile on his face. “Of course, I haven’t looked at it in four years…”

* * *

Flip.

_ December 13th, 1918. Woodrow Wilson is the first one of my bosses to cross the Atlantic Ocean. We’re going to visit an old friend of mine, but not for pleasure. We’ve arrived at his home. I step off the ship with Wilson, who seems prepared to negotiate. A tall, blonde nation approaches us, along with his boss. “Bonjour, America, it’s been so long,” France says as a greeting. “I was beginning to think you’d forgotten me and the others, you never visit.” I offer an apologetic smile before I explain that things are changing. We’re ready to go to Paris. _

Woodrow Wilson was the first sitting President to visit Europe. He was present at the Versailles Conference following the end of World War One.

Flip.

_ July 26th, 1923. Warren G. Harding and the Duchess (a.k.a. the First Lady) step off of the USS Henderson, and I’m only a step behind them. About two weeks ago, Harding was the first President to visit Alaska, and now we just made more history. A nation around my age comes forward to greet us, and I grin. We’re ready for Harding to be the first sitting President to visit Canada. _

Warren G. Harding died a few days later on the trip back home. Although his death was determined to be the result of natural causes, some historians used to speculate that his wife, Florence “Flossie” King DeWolfe, also known as “the Duchess” for her shrill nagging, had murdered him. Harding, one of America’s most handsome Presidents, had several affairs. One woman, Nan Britton, bore him a daughter the year before he made his bid for the White House.

Flip.

_ August 2nd, 1923. I wrinkle my nose as the messenger and I reach our destination. What a dump! I almost laughed when they told me that Calvin Coolidge didn’t have electricity or a telephone in his house...so I had to come with a messenger to deliver the bad news before the inauguration. I pound on the door to the house. A man who looks like he was weaned on a pickle answers the door. It’s Calvin Coolidge. The messenger delivers the news in a much better way than I could have done it before he leaves. I’m so tired...I stumble around the house for a while, then make my way into the parlor. I think there are five other people in here, aside from Coolidge and his father. It’s 2:47 AM, according to the large clock in the room. John Coolidge swears in his son as President, then Calvin and I yawn. We’re ready to get some rest. _

Calvin Coolidge was once described as Alice Roosevelt as someone who looked like “he was weaned on a pickle”. Calvin Coolidge, the only President to have been sworn in by his father, developed a reputation for being a man of few words. One famous story tells of a woman who called the White House. She allegedly said to Coolidge, “Mr. President, I bet my husband I could make you say more than two words to me.” Coolidge replied with: “You lose.”

Flip.

_ September 17th, 1930. If I could slap my boss, I would. I look a mess right now because the people are facing an economic Depression. Hoover isn’t doing anything about it. If I die, let it be known that it was his fault. Today does bring some good news: there’s an opportunity now, and it may create new jobs. Every little bit helps, right…? I think of the people. I think that this will be good for them, and for me, in the long run. We’re ready to create the Hoover Dam. _

Herbert Hoover was the first President to have a telephone in the Oval Office. (Before that, there was a phone in a booth next to the office.) FDR once thought that Hoover, a self-made millionaire, would make an excellent President. Hoover was not.

Flip.

_ December 8th, 1941. Franklin Delano Roosevelt is addressing Congress about what happened yesterday. I’ve been crying ever since I heard the news. Japan didn’t do it. His boss did. Germany isn’t murdering millions of innocent people. His boss is. They hate their bosses. They hate what’s happening. And I hate it, too. I hate that this is what we’re being forced to do. Roosevelt calls me over, and I stand next to him. We’re ready to fight. _

Franklin Delano Roosevelt served longer than other Presidents: almost four terms. He died in Warm Springs, Georgia, during his fourth term as President. Winston Churchill wrote: “He died on the wings of victory, but he saw them and heard them beating.” Roosevelt’s last written words, which were found on a draft of a speech he was writing, were: “The only limit to the realization of tomorrow is our doubts of today.”

Flip.

_ May 14th, 1948. I run into the Oval Office, gasping for air. As I catch my breath, I explain to the man sitting at the desk that Israel has just declared itself an independent nation. Harry Truman grins, and I know exactly what he’s thinking. We’re ready to be the first to recognize Israel as a nation. _

Harry Truman recognized Israel as a nation only eleven minutes after the people declared independence. Harry Truman was also the first President to appoint an envoy to the Vatican and the only President to be a thirty-third-degree Mason.

Flip.

_ January 19th, 1955. I’m not one to normally shy away from the spotlight, but...I think I’m struggling with stage fright. I glance at Dwight D. Eisenhower. If he’s as nervous as I am, he doesn’t look like it. It isn’t that we’re going to be in front of other people...it’s that we’re going to be on television. “Get a grip, soldier,” I tell myself. “It’s just a little box. Nothing to worry about.” Dwight chuckles behind me, and I relax. We’re ready for the first televised press conference. _

Dwight D. Eisenhower, the five-star general of World War Two, was the first President to have a televised press conference. During 1955, he signed the act that began the interstate highway system. If you go to Walter Reed Hospital, the place where he died in 1969, you’ll find a portrait he painted of Winston Churchill. Eisenhower’s last words were: “I’ve always loved my wife. I’ve always loved my children. I’ve always loved my country.”

Flip.

_ May 25th, 1961. On July 8th, 1947, a UFO crash-landed in Roswell, New Mexico. Ever since that little incident, I’ve been obsessed with the concept of space and aliens. My bosses in the past have talked about the possibility of going into space, but not on this level until now. Stupid Russia and his stupid friends just sent a man into space...and now my boss, JFK, wants to take it up a notch. I’m screaming with excitement on the inside. We’re ready to land a man on the moon. _

John F. Kennedy accomplished so much during his term. Yes, things were tense with Communist nations, but Kennedy remained popular. He was the one who first proposed that America send a man to land on the moon. He was handsome, the youngest man to be elected President, the son of a Hollywood film producer...and the last President, as of 2017, to have been assassinated. Other members of the Kennedy family have died tragically since his passing, but none of them have been forgotten.

Flip.

_ November 22nd, 1963. It’s so hot. My face is wet. Is this sweat or tears? I want to press my hands to my face, but I don’t. I stand at attention, about an arm’s length away from Lyndon B. Johnson, who looks shaken, but somewhat professional. His hand is placed on the missal that Judge Sarah Tilghman holds before him. His mouth moves, but I can’t hear the words he speaks. When everything's said and done, he turns to his wife and kisses her on the forehead. Then his eyes meet mine, then we both turn our gaze to the woman hiding in the background. Johnson approaches her and says something, and for a moment, I don’t feel sad. We’re ready to comfort the mourning nation. _

Lyndon B. Johnson was riding in a car behind John F. Kennedy’s car on the day of the fateful assassination. Johnson was escorted to Love Field, Dallas and taken onto a cramped, hot Air Force One. Twenty-seven people, including his wife and the widowed Mrs. Kennedy, were present at this inauguration. Johnson is the first President to have been sworn in on an airplane.

Flip.

_ August 9th, 1974. I watch Richard Nixon make his farewell address, barely concealing my disgust. After everything I did to support him...how could he betray me by doing something this low? No, it’s not even that; politicians play dirty all the time. It’s the fact that he got caught and still won’t own up to it. He’s resigning because he doesn’t want to admit his guilt. He doesn’t want more nasty details of his involvement to come to light. He has a forced smile on his face as he turns to me and shakes my hand. We’re ready for him to leave and never come back. _

Richard Nixon is the only President to have resigned from office due to the scandalous and top-secret audio tapes that exposed his involvement in the Watergate Scandal. (The tapes are so confidential and top-secret that they’re on YouTube.) His Vice President, Spiro Agnew, did not succeed him as President, probably because his only qualification was the fact that if you rearranged the letters in his name, you got “grow a penis”.

Flip.

_ January 27th, 1973. To be honest, I still don’t know what to think of Gerald Ford. He’s...not the worst President I’ve had. I think he’s very unlucky. One bad thing happens, then that leads to another, and it just becomes too much for him to handle. There are a few things that he’s done, things that he was in complete control of...and I hate how he handled those things. I don’t even want to talk about them; I’m so disgusted. But today might be something that I can be proud of. We’re in the Oval Office. I’m pacing back and forth, but Ford is at his desk, deep in thought. Somewhere, Henry Kissinger is negotiating for an ideal outcome. We’re ready to end the Vietnam War. _

Gerald Ford is the only man who was never officially elected as Vice President or President. Spiro Agnew had resigned as Vice President a year before Nixon stepped down as President. Nixon had proposed that Ford be the replacement, and this was approved by Congress. People suspected that this decision was what led to Ford’s pardon of Nixon. The Presidential pardon was probably what led to Ford only having one term in office. Ford is also the only President to have been a King...in name only. Gerald Ford was born as Leslie Lynch King Jr. He took the name of his new stepfather at the age of two. Ford only met his biological father twice: once while he was soda jerking and again after a high school football game.

Flip.

_ January 20th, 1977. “Jimmy Carter, you’re the first man from Georgia to become President of the United States! What are you going to do next?” I ask my new boss. I hold an imaginary microphone up to his face like a reporter would. Carter just smiles. I know what he’s going to do. I do everything I can to help him as he prepares to fill out an executive order. We’re ready to keep our promise to the people. _

Jimmy Carter was the first Georgian President, as well as the first President to have been born in an office. His time as President wasn’t too awful or too fantastic, but he did manage to keep a promise by pardoning evaders of the Vietnam War Draft during his first few days in office. Today, Carter does charity work and serves as an Honorary Chair for the World Justice Project.

Flip.

_ March 30th, 1981. If you had told me a few years ago that an actor would become a politician and then my boss, I would have laughed. But Ronald Reagan is the new President. I like him! We’re still in the transitioning period, but I think that there’s a lot of promise in him. How bad can he be? The man loves jelly beans, for crying out loud! Anyway, we’re going to make speeches today...I’ve felt a little unsettled since a few days ago. We visited the Ford Theatre where Abe was shot, and since then...I don’t know, it’s probably just me. Reagan, the sweet old man, is waiting for me outside. We’re ready to go to the Washington Hilton Hotel. _

As he left the hotel, Ronald Reagan was shot by John Hinckley Jr. Reagan did not die; he was taken to a hospital and recovered from the wounds. Hinckley’s motivations for shooting Reagan were mainly to impress actress Jodie Foster; he was released on September 10th, 2016, after serving time in prison. Ronald Reagan had a fondness for jelly beans; his favorite flavor was black licorice. The Jelly Belly company created the blueberry bean in Reagan’s honor.

Flip.

_ January 8th, 1992. “You won today, but I’ll get you next time,” I whisper to Japan, a smile on my face. The corners of his mouth twitch, but I can see that he’s smiling with his eyes. I’m sitting next to him. A few seats down from me is George Herbert Walker Bush. He’s sitting next to Japan’s boss, Kiichi Miyazawa. Earlier today, the two of them played a doubles match of tennis, along with Kiichi’s son and another American diplomat. Miyazawa and his son, of course, won. “Anyway, this food is amazing!” I say to Japan. “These little sticks make it so hard for me to stuff my face and gain weight!” I look over at Bush to see what he thinks...and then he goes pale in the face, turns his head, and empties the contents of his stomach onto Miyazawa. I gasp, mortified. Japan looks shocked. Bush looks faint. His wife approaches him with a white handkerchief. I stand up and go to join her. We’re ready to make a hasty exit before he gets even more sick. _

George H.W. Bush is the first President to have been documented vomiting on a foreign dignitary. Maybe this is why eating blowfish is used by Americans to test their big-ballsiness? George Bush Senior was also the first President to appoint a Hispanic to a cabinet position.

Flip.

_ July 11, 2000. Bill Clinton once told me that he met JFK at his college. I see a lot of Kennedy in him. He has this charming quality about him that have the ladies falling at his feet. But we’re not going to Camp David to court women. We’re going to see Palestine and Israel and their bosses. It’ll be good to have some nice, peaceful conversations. Clinton smiles, like he’s reading my thoughts. We’re ready for the two nations to reach an agreement. _

Bill Clinton wasn’t the first President to have an affair. He was, however, the first President to have his license to practice law suspended because he lied under oath about his affair. He was the second President to face impeachment. He was also the first President to appoint his wife to head a presidential commission...okay, moving on...

Flip.

_ May 5th, 2001. I normally like to spend my Saturdays watching cartoons, but I’ll make an exception in this case. George W. Bush, the son of the other George Bush, is sitting at his desk and looking through his papers. I’m a little worried at first...can he really read all those big words? Does he need pictures? But after a few spoken sentences of the foreign language, I’m at ease. We’re ready to deliver a Saturday morning radio address. _

George W. Bush is mostly remembered for his “Bushisms”, including “Is our children learning?” and “They misunderestimated me”. People tend to forget that he was the first President to deliver the same address from the Oval Office in two languages. He is also the only President to have played Little League baseball.

_ March 21st, 2016. “How long is this flight going to be?” I’m whining because I’m impatient and nervous. Cuba isn’t exactly friends with me. My former bosses used to meet with his bosses, but I haven’t visited Cuba’s house in over fifty years. I want to make a good impression. Barack Obama is sitting behind me. He leans forward and whispers some words of encouragement in my ear, and I focus on what he says. We’re ready to have a good relationship with Cuba. _

Barack Obama will forever be remembered as the first African American President. He is also the first sitting President to have won the Nobel Peace Prize. He ended military involvement in Iraq. He normalized relations with Cuba (much to the relief of some, because Cuba has three very unflattering political cartoons of other Presidents on display in their Museum of the Revolution).

* * *

America closed the book.  _ Is this it? Will everything that we’ve worked for...the good and the bad...end with the next boss I have? Am I…? _ He swallowed.  _ Am I going to die? _ He shook his head, trying to get the tears to go away...a small drop of water escaped his eye and landed on another book, one from the pile that his journal had been grouped with. America sniffled, wiped his nose on his sleeve, and picked up the other book. He read the title and smiled a bittersweet smile. He began to flip through the pages. It was a photo album of the times he spent with other nations.

Flip.

There was that one time when he helped trace the hackers that had been bothering Estonia.

Flip.

There was that one time that Lithuania had first moved in.

Flip.

There was that one time when he had first visited Japan.

Flip.

There was the day he had met Belarus for the first time.

Flip.

Playing catch with Canada…

Flip.

Getting diet help from China, France, and Japan…

Flip.

Prank calling Russia with an order of condoms…

Flip.

That awful, yet hilarious, April Fool’s Day…

Flip.

That one time that he had invited the nations over so that they could compare horror films…

Flip.

The big Christmas party…

Flip.

That time he had scared England on Halloween…

Flip. Flip. Flip. Flip. Flip. Flip. Flip. Flip...

Good times. Good times. Good times. Good times. Good times. Good times. Good times. Good times…

The last page with a photo on it made his tears vanish (almost) completely. It was of him and his friends. France looked beautiful and sexy, and oh-so-aware of it, but not arrogant. Russia loomed in the background and towered over them all, but he didn’t seem frightening. China winked at the camera, but his confidence wasn’t patronizing. Italy was gave a salute to the camera, but the gesture wasn’t mocking, like he was going to run away as soon as the photo developed. England and Japan didn’t smile or frown, but they weren’t totally serious or emotionless. Germany scowled, but he wasn’t irritated. In the center of it all was America. And the others looked just like him.

They looked happy.

America took a deep breath before he closed the book. “It’s going to be okay,” he promised himself. “Because I know that I’ll always have them to keep me strong.” He read the title of the book once more before he placed it next to his journal, picked up the few things that he had managed to sort through, and exited the storage room. Before he closed the door, he repeated the title once more to the room, just to hear it out loud:

“Marukaite Chikyuu”.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Marukaite Chikyuu: Draw a circle, it's the Earth
> 
> Regarding the most recent Presidents...I'm twenty years old. I was raised by staunch Democrats in a very Republican area. I grew up in a household with parents who regarded Reagan as one of the worst Presidents. I attended a school where a teacher referred to Jimmy Carter as "history's greatest monster". I'm a person who tries to find the good in everyone, and ever since I turned eighteen, I've been trying to find my own views in the world of politics. I try to see the good in all of the former Presidents...it's hard, sometimes. But then I remember: politicians are people, too. People make mistakes. They have to do things that they think are right, even if it hurts them. America hasn't had a perfect President, and he never will have one. I guess what I'm trying to say is: please don't kill me if I said something or didn't say something regarding the most recent American Presidents.
> 
> One day until Trump becomes President.
> 
> Also, here are the links to the Watergate tapes:
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_oe3OgU8W0s
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VN0VRzcSbZg
> 
> And finally, something light-hearted: Italy's ballad to Germany!
> 
> Germany, Germany, Germany is a great place  
> They feed me even though I'm a prisoner  
> The food doesn't taste crappy like British stuff either  
> Sausage, cheese, it's all so tasty!  
> For a dog, it's heaven; that's what Germany is.  
> But why are all Germans so stern? I feel like I'm going to be crushed by their intimidation  
> My heart is so afraid and I'm going to cry. The girls are so big, too  
> Is it your hobby to burst barrels of beer every day?  
> Also, please stop raiding my house in swarms. The tourists are way too scary  
> German chicks are bigger and better built than me

**Author's Note:**

> Where did I get most of this information? "Which President Killed a Man?", written by Presidential speechwriter James Humes.


End file.
